Did air travel ever really feel luxurious? You know, like “flight attendant carving ham in the aisle” kind of luxurious? Well, apparently that was a real thing back in the day. But oh, how far we’ve fallen. As air travel has become more economically democratized, so has the experience.
Nowadays, we herd ourselves through concourses, belly up to whatever feeding trough is nearest our gate, and file onto our winged cattle cars, all while bracing ourselves for what has become — for most of us, anyway — a decidedly spartan exercise in modern sociological misery.
But for those of us who choose to partake, airports have always offered that prized over-the-counter stress reliever in abundance: booze. Whether it’s a proper airport pint, deep pour of Savvy-B, or the classic airport Martini, we’ve always had trusty alcohol to take the edge off of a day of discomfort.
Yet now, even the seemingly God-given right to get tipsy at the terminal is being called into question.
Recently the CEO of Ryanair, Michael O’Leary, suggested that airports should enforce a two-drink maximum pre-flight. As tales of passengers-gone-bad feature ever more frequently in the media, it appears that those bad apples are once again threatening to spoil the ritual for the rest of us.
The data doesn’t look good, either, with FAA “unruly passenger reports” surging substantially. And though 2021 and its Covid-era anti-mask belligerents were primarily to blame for the freakish 500 percent leap that year, the number of incidents continues to remain stubbornly aloft over pre-pandemic levels to the tune of around 100 percent in 2023 — with 2024 on track to match or exceed that number.
With that sort of fuel on the fire, are we really now at risk of losing our privilege to booze before boarding? When asked, an airline captain, a Million Miler, and the FAA had a few choice words on the topic.
Sobering Words of Wisdom From Your Captain
The crew’s-eye view from 38,000 feet above the fracas us “pesky pax” are causing is one part moderate concern, one part business as usual. Our captain today — we’ll call him Captain “Carl” to honor his request for anonymity — has been flying commercial passenger aircraft for over three decades, and currently captains Airbus A330s on international long hauls for a major U.S. carrier.
Carl cuts right to the chase when it comes to drunken behavior. “My airline is supposed to prevent boarding [of drunk passengers] at the boarding gate,” he says. “They shouldn’t even make it to the aircraft door.” Yet obviously, that’s easier said than done.
It’s tricky for the gate crew to quickly size up demeanor while scanning through the queue. Different people behave differently while under the influence — the jovial, red-faced fellow who’s had two beers drawing attention away from that stone-cold, sober-looking guy who just spent the past few hours knocking back tequila shots at the bar across the concourse. The former will probably be fine en route, while the latter could be a sleeper agent of in-flight inebriated mischief.
“Air travel is not a right, it’s a privilege. It’s reasonable to impose some standards of decorum when shoving humans into such close proximity. [But] coming home after a business trip, having a glass of bourbon on that last leg home is a ritual. Don’t take away my bourbon just because some jack-wagon can’t handle his booze.”
Carl doesn’t seem to care one way or the other on the methodology to keep his aircraft shenanigan-free, just as long as the job gets done. “Some sort of quantity consumption control could be effective, but difficult to enforce,” he says. “[But] the end result is the issue. How they do it doesn’t affect me and the crew.”
He adds that the most recent issues were largely tied to Covid restrictions, the last of which was lifted in May 2023. “They can [be] and were amplified by alcohol. Most were resolved by the crew by restricting service during the flight,” Carl says. “[But] there is always a segment of folks that can’t behave in public regardless of their consumption habits. We have personnel specifically trained to de-escalate these situations before departure, [and] we try very hard not to take problems airborne.”
But some will always manage to slip through the surveillance — and are seeming to do it more frequently due to the increasingly problematic behavior of modern mass tourism — leaving the powers that be pondering an airport drinks embargo.
Elite-Level Frequent Fliers Are Definitely Judging You
Besides crew, the exclusive club of professional-level frequent fliers has an outsized share of skin in this game.
Happiness and relaxation in an airport terminal, or packed into a metal tube a few miles up, isn’t easy to come by. Small pleasures, like a well-deserved quality drink when and where you want one, are important for these business travelers on the move for significant stretches of their lives.
“I’ve noticed that flight attendants are [now] pretty vigilant about tracking drinks consumption onboard. You see someone asking for three or four, that’s gonna be your potential problem passenger.”
Jeremy Brann is a Delta Million Miler — his professional status as sales manager at a major global software firm enabling his rarified standing. In addition, Brann is also a bonafide “Kentucky Colonel” and serious whiskey aficionado residing in the heart of bourbon country. “Air travel is not a right, it’s a privilege. It’s reasonable to impose some standards of decorum when shoving humans into such close proximity,” he says. “[But] coming home after a business trip, having a glass of bourbon on that last leg home is a ritual,” he counters. “Don’t take away my bourbon just because some jack-wagon can’t handle his booze.”
What is it about airports — and even specific airlines — that exacerbates the temptation to go from pleasantly buzzed to outright hammered? There’s a sort of drinking culture woven into the fabric of air travel that now pervades both terminal and aircraft. “I definitely tend to drink more at airports, or you could say I care less about what time it is when I start drinking,” Brann says. “I don’t go get plowed every time I fly, but it’s also true that at home I wouldn’t get a glass of wine at 11 a.m.”
From his experience, Brann thinks it’s all about stress interacting with boredom, resulting in a baking soda meets vinegar volcano of bad behavior. “People tend to drink more on vacation and when they’re stressed, and both of those happen in an airport,” he says. “At any given airport bar at any given moment, some percentage of the crowd just got bumped from a flight, or their flight is delayed, and maybe that ruined their vacation. Airports are full of an emotionally charged crowd: on their way to a job interview or a big presentation, [or] maybe they’re heading to a wedding or a funeral.”
So with the drinking culture of air travel firmly entrenched for justifiable reasons, would it really be possible to impose some kind of strict consumption control?
Between alcohol self-service in airport lounges and the ability to bar hop throughout the terminal to avoid getting cut off, it would require heavily invasive intervention from the FAA and TSA to officially enforce limits. And don’t forget the economic damage that would do to airport businesses, not all of which are major chains that could survive the impact.
The Airlines and the FAA Are Watching
Despite the difficulty of enforcement and current unlikelihood of such a dramatic crackdown, the threat from O’Leary and others still looms over airport alcohol culture. And if things continue to get more out of hand, those who write the rules may be forced to snatch away our beloved airport and mid-flight bevvies.
When asked about the situation, the FAA response is predictably buttoned up. “The FAA has a zero-tolerance policy toward unruly passengers,” says an FAA spokesperson. “Failing to obey a flight attendant’s instructions constitutes interfering with a crewmember.” She also points out a press release on the FAA’s increasing keenness to refer unruly passenger cases to the FBI, threatening criminal prosecution and five-figure fines. “We’re also aggressively getting the word out about what can happen to people who engage in this dangerous behavior,” she adds, referring to a campaign of social media memes and other public service announcements.
Additionally, the airlines themselves are now paying extra attention to any behavioral red flags or telltale signs of overt inebriation. “Problem drinkers can request more between normal service times,” Captain Carl says. “Those people are known and monitored by the crew.” Brann has observed the change in action. “I’ve noticed that flight attendants are [now] pretty vigilant about tracking drinks consumption onboard,” he says. “You see someone asking for three or four, that’s gonna be your potential problem passenger.” Order that extra Scotch or three between meals en route? You’ve been flagged for close scrutiny by the flight attendants.
So before you go ahead and stir up yet another DIY airport Espresso Martini, be sure your conduct and level of inebriation are both in check. We’re all in this together, but because of the poor behavior of a few, the rule-makers are now keeping a watchful eye on us all — ready to shut the party down if it gets further out of control.
The article Are Airports About to Start Restricting Your Drinks? appeared first on VinePair.